What Losing 180lbs Looks Like (New Progress Pictures!)

I'm excited to being sharing the next installment of progress pictures with ya'll today!  

They are actually a bit overdue as I try to post every time I lose 20lbs, but this time there is 32lbs in between today's pics and the previous ones. So without further adieu...

Photo on the Left: 204lbs & Photo on the Right: 172lbs

If you are interested in checking out every progress picture I've taken since the beginning of my weight loss journey (in 20lb increments), you can do so at my "My Progress" page. 

I always do like to compare the first pictures I ever took (which still were of me after I had already lost about 20lbs) with my current ones. So, here's what losing 180lbs looks like: 

When I look at these pictures I still have a hard time believing I actually ever looked like that. I mean, I was so big my body wouldn't even fit into the frame of the photo! However, I don't look at the girl in  my before photos and hate her- she was loved by many (most importantly by God) and had many people in her life that she loved. She was doing her best with what she had and the situations that life had handed her. More than anything I just feel sad when I look at her. Sad that she had allowed herself to become a victim of her circumstances, sad that she wasn't living in the freedom and victory that were available to her, and sad that she didn't seem to know what she was really capable of and deserved. 

But I know now.

 3 years later, I know that there is nothing I can't do through Christ's strength and grace. I know that nothing can dictate my present and future other than my own choices and God's sovereignty. I know that I am worth fighting for and that nothing is out of my reach. I know that I have nothing to fear in this journey except the power I have to chose to settle for less than my best, which means I have nothing to fear because I am hell-bent on finishing this race even stronger than I began. 

Question #1: What have you proven to yourself during your weight loss journey that you didn't know before you began? 

Question #2: This is a little random, but has anyone tried PB2? I read about it on a blog recently but wanted to get some more opinions- has anyone else tried this? 

Our Healthy Halloween Fun!

So, remember how it was just last week that D and I had the honest & frank conversation about how I needed him to support me in regards to healthy eating? 

Well, apparently old dogs can learn new tricks because when I got home from work last Wednesday, I arrived to find that he had planned & prepared a mini-Halloween party for the two of us that was composed of all HEALTHY Halloween treats! 

I mean, besides the fact that he's also Captain America, I'm pretty sure I have the greatest husband ever :) 

He started off our healthy Halloween dinner with these: 

Monster mouth caramel apples! (The teeth are made from sliced almonds!) 

Followed by the main course: 

Mummified Flatbread Pizza & Brussel Sprouts (btw- it's official, brussel sprouts are not for me and I promise it's not how they were prepared- I didn't hate them but the fact is they just have too much of a vegetable taste for me- bleck!)

And finally, dessert!

Frozen "carved" clementine shell filled with frozen greek yogurt and reduced sugar/fat chocolate sauce! 

I've gotta say, for not knowing all that much about healthy eating (except for what I've taught him) and not really caring about what he eats for himself at all, I was super duper impressed with his take on a healthy Halloween dinner but more importantly that he obviously had taken to heart our conversation the week before. I'm a blessed girl. 

Weigh In: 

• Previous Weigh In: 176lbs
• This Weeks Weigh In: 172lbs 
• Result: Loss of 4lbs! 

My goal this week is to continue to lose another 2lbs per week and I'll be glad to take more than that a week as I know I have some tough weeks ahead (the Holidays but we are also traveling to Spain in two weeks) but nothing is going to stop me from reaching my goal of 160lbs by Christmas! 

Question: Anyone have any good Holiday eating survival strategies to share? 

Losing Weight & Not Your Significant Other

Losing weight is hard- period. And for me, losing weight became harder when I moved from singledom to having a boyfriend (my now hubby!). Why you ask? Because D loves him some food. Like... a lot. Don't believe me? 

I have proof: 

 I told you. 

Earlier today a bloggy friend wrote me expressing that she was now having trouble continuing to lose weight now that she is in a relationship and as I wrote her back from my experience and with some advice I thought that surely this could be helpful to others because the truth is that it's a lot easier to deny yourself and go into 100% hardcore weight loss mode when you are single and your choices are directly effecting someone else. 

Let me preface this by saying that I've done nothing but lose weight since D & I started dating 11 months ago but it has not been without struggle. I found that when we would go on dates that I felt like turning down the opportunity to feed each other ice cream and bake cookies together just didn't seem fair- I felt like I was missing out on some essential dating right of passage or something. And because I was far from my heaviest at the time, it was easy to slack a little here and there. For a few months during our dating relationship, I found myself quite comfortable in maintenance mode. The problem with that is that I wasn't at a weight I wanted to maintain- I still had more to lose and I needed to stop living, thinking & eating as if I had already reached my goal. 

It's hard to tell the person you love who just wants to do nice things for you and have fun adventures (that include food) that you just can't or that they are going to have to rethink their plans in order to accommodate your healthy living choices. It's hard, but not impossible. 

For example, the other night D lovingly texted me that he was going to pick up dinner for us on his way home from work (so sweet!); however, although I made sure to ask that he get me something healthy (which was hard enough) he decided to come home with BBQ ribs, pulled pork, mashed potatoes & garlic bread...REALLY!!?!?! 

After dinner he could tell that I was kind of quiet and when he asked what was up we had a very honest conversation where I explained that when I eat something that is unhealthy, it's not the same as it is for him where he just thinks, "Yea, that wasn't very healthy or nutritious, oh well, it was delicious and so worth it!" I explained that for me, when I eat things like that it's more than just a feeling of guilt that I feel, it's a feeling of defeat. I feel defeated because I know that I'm not making decisions that are going to lead me where I want to go. I think that helped everything click for him because, I believe, that if someone truly loves you, they aren't going to want to contribute to you living in defeat, but victory. And he followed up  by asking what he could do to help me reach my goal; see if you're like me you'd think..."uh, not wouldn't not bringing home BBQ be an obvious answer?" but to the mind of the person who has never been overweight or had 100+lbs to lose, they don't realize that it's not just a cheat meal, it can lead to a cheat meal marathon month. 

So here's the advice that I gave my bloggy friend & that I'm currently living out myself. When it comes to enjoying your relationship/marriage and still reaching your weight loss goals, I suggest: 

• Having a frank and honest conversation with your significant other; share your story of how you became overweight, what your goals are & how they can help you reach them. 
• Find ways to incorporate and enjoy food with them- it doesn't have to be all carrot sticks and protein shakes; make a healthy dessert together or research a new restaurant to go to and check the menu before you go for the healthiest option. 
• At the end of the day, we all have to come to the realization that the only person who is going to make the tough decisions of saying no to food temptation and yes to the gym is us- it's not our significant others. If we are waiting on them to suddenly change their eating patterns or plan our meals for us, we're gonna find ourselves 5 years older, 25lbs heavier and regretting letting ourselves go. 

Losing weight and being married/in a relationship is  possible. It will take sacrifice, planning & hard work, but hey, doesn't anything that's worth something? 

I'm BAAAAAAAAACK as a Mrs!

Why, hello there :)

After taking a post-wedding blogging haiatus, I am so glad to be getting back into the groove of things.

While we've only been married for almost 2 months, it already kinda feels like a lifetime away- did anyone else experience that?

Here are the quick wedding details:

• I married the love of my life early last month- he is the most kind, loving, integrit person I have ever met and I am blessed to be able to live life with him. We met almost 3 years ago, began dating 11 months ago & have been loving every moment of our almost 2 month old marriage! 

(This is the only professional picture we've received back thus far, I'll be sure to post a few more once we get them!)  And yes, I know you can see my bra... :/

• D (that's the hubby fyi), being the amazing man that he is, planned our entire honeymoon on his own and didn't tell me where we were going until the day of the wedding! While I'm still kind of surprised my anal-retentive control freak self let him plan the whole thing without even telling me one detail, I'm glad I did because he did an incredible job. Where'd we go? BOSTON!

Because we are going to be doing a lot of traveling in November (Spain) and December (Arizona to see my fam) we wanted to do a more low key honeymoon so Boston was perfect! I found it to have quite a few similarities architecturally to the 'Burgh but with a way cooler feel. It was laid back yet outdoorsy which is totally us without being crunchy (my word for hippie meets yuppy). The picture above was while we did Boston's Freedom Trail and we spent the rest of our time exploring the various neat little neighborhoods and Boston. All in all, it was a delightful time :)

Weight Loss Journey Progress:

As of Monday I am weighing in at 176lbs, which means a couple things:

1. I have surpassed my original long term goal of weighing 180lbs!!!
2. I have officially lost as much weight as I currently weigh!!! I've lost a whole me- that's craziness, folks. So for those not good at math (tee hee), I've lost a grand total of 176lbs!!!
3. It is past-time for my next round of progress pics (I'll post them next week).
4. Finally, this means that I am 16lbs away from my new final goal of 160lbs.

I  have been on this journey for almost 3 years and while it has been one of the most rewarding and challenging of my life, I am reading for this chapter to come to a close and the chapter of maintenance to begin. In an ideal world I'd like to lose these 16lbs by the time I fly home for Christmas and begin 2013 at my goal weight of 160lbs (this would average a 2lb loss per week) and while I can't guarantee I'll meet that goal (because of factors beyond my control (read: whether my body decides to give up the weight or not), not because of factors I can control (read: inhaling Christmas cookies), I'm going to give everything I have to finish this journey as strong as I deserve to- which is pretty darn strong.

Signing off for this week~I hope all is well with all my old and new bloggy friends out there. It's good to be back :)

A Pre-Wedding Wake Up Call

Well helllooooo!

The past few months have been amongs the busiest of my life- I guess that's to be expected as I've been organizing to move, planning my wedding, preparing our new house to be moved into, had a major change in my position at work, have had some significant health problems and trying to maintain all the other necessities of life. I'm not going to blabber on but I'll just keep it short- life has been a bit overwhelming at times but thank goodness, there is a light at the end of the tunnel because...my wedding is only 15 days away!!! Whew am I excited- I'm ready to be done with the planning, the tasks, the $ spending and ready to just be married to this amazing man:

Let me be honest, it has been very hard to continue losing weight over these past couple months. I am currently weighing in at 186lbs (a total loss of 166lbs) and while I know that may seem impressive, I've been messing around with these 6 pounds for almost two months now, and not because the scale just won't budge, but because I've slipped into mediocrity.

You probably won't hear this from many bloggers but I'm going to be very honest. It was much easier for me to continue pushing myself to food prep like a mad woman, say no to greasy food & desserts and workout 5x's per week when I was single & was horrified by my weight. I was able to put all of my focus on losing weight and getting healthy & now my attention is split 10 different ways and healthy living has had to take somewhat of a back seat.

We will all go through busier/crazier seasons in life when we literally CANNOT get to the gym or food prep the way that we would like but it's important that we are honest with ourselves enough to say that being busy or not having the time to work out doesn't give us license to eat a blizzard or stuff our face with chips and salsa.

For the first time in my almost 3 year journey, I found myself over the last 4 months or so making excuses and just put simply- not giving my best. I'm okay with the fact that weight loss and health isn't in my top 3 of priorities anymore as some really amazing things have come into my life that now take a higher priority, but that doesn't mean that I should be okay with living below what I deserve.

Yesterday was somewhat of a wake up call for me. I finally accepted that if I continue to live the way I'm living that I'm going to end up gaining weight back and I WILL NOT ALLOW that to happen. Mark. my. words. I deserve more. I can do better because I ALREADY HAVE done it. 

I'm finished with the excuses, I'm finished with the complacency & I'm finished not moving toward greatness. 

My goal is to weigh no more than 180lbs on my wedding day & I'm gonna give my all to get there. It's not where I want to be but it's not where I am either. 

Next week I've already made a plan and shopping list to get myself away from the sodium filled/processed/carby foods I've been eating and introducing veggies & fruits back into my life. I'm sure there will be some sodium withdrawls but oh, well- I'm moving on and moving forward. 

To leave you on a lighter note; here's a pic of my and my bridesmaids (minus 1) at my wedding shower in June :) 

Enough about me. How are y'all doing??? Looking forward to checking out your blogs today- it's been too long!

Summer = Salad Time!

Despite my not so great picture taking skills, I promise you I've been enjoying this delicious salad all week long- yum! When the weather gets warmer (not that it's really all that warm yet here in Pittsburgh- it was 39 degrees this morning at the bus stop! grrr) salad becomes my go-to meal. This is one of my favorite salad concauctions & includes:

• Romain & Spring Mix
• Strawberries
• Aged parmesan & asiago cheese (from Trader Joe's)
• Caesar flavored almonds
• Raspberr Gorgonzola Dress (from Trader Joe's aka TJ's)
• Grilled Chicken Strips (TJ's) 

= 299 Calories!

I intend to maintain having salads for at least one of my meals each day up through the wedding, next week's salad creation will be something I've never tried before- a mediterranean type salad, I'll be sure to share my recipe & how it turns out next week.

Weigh In:

May Goal: Be at 190lbs by May 31st
Last Week's Weigh In: 195lbs
This Week's Weigh In: 191lbs (-4lbs!!!)
A Total Weightloss of: 161lbs!

I attribute this great loss to being meticulous about what I've been eating; I've been tracking daily using myfitnesspal & have been staying at or under a net of 1300 calories daily. I have had zero time to work out lately and when that happens I know that I've got to pay even that much more attention to my nutrition.

Now I'm a Believer:

I had always heard that if you aren't eating enough calories that you won't lose weight. I never really thought there was much validity to that but I now officially believe that to be true. Earlier this month I was working out like a fiend & eating around 1200 calories a day and wasn't seeing the scale budge at all, if anything it was going up and I just didn't understand what was going on- it was discouraging. What I wasn't paying attention to was that if I'm only eating 1200 calories a day and then burning 600 calories working out each day that I'm really only netting 600 which simply isn't enough to keep my body happy, functioning & continuing to give up the excess pounds. I was shooting myself in the foot basically.

In the last week or so I have upped my calorie intake on the days that I'm working out and kept it low on the days I'm not and so far it seems to be working great- only 1lb away from achieving my goal for the month of May! Whoo hoo!

This weekend I'm in the wedding of two of my best friends and I am so excited- I'll be sure to share pics & stuff next week!

Until then, let's keep doing the "impossible!"

New Blog Additions!

I figured after 2+ years & 150ish pounds that it was finally time for a blog facelift, hence the new look!

I decided to add the new pages above because it's what I think it most important. I realize that not everyone who is currently reading this blog has been reading since the beginning so chances are you may have missed some stuff. So for anyone interested in reading more about where I've come from, how I am doing it & where I'm headed- check. it. out!

I spent the last week in NYC for work with D (aka: the love of my life :) It was my first time in the city & it truly was a B.L.A.S.T.

Not sure where this Sunday's weekly weigh in will have me at but regardless of what it says, I'm keeping my chin up & a smile on my face because life is simply too short & God is too good to do anything else.



He Must Have Liked it Because...

So after typing & re-typing a million different semi-clever ways to say it, I figured it would be best to just come out and fill you all in on a rather major occurence that happened a bit ago...

I'm Getting Married!!!

I met "D" almost 2 years ago now and for almost that entire time we were just friends and would chat occasionally when we bumped into each other at church; however, a while back we were a part of a group that traveled to Israel together & shortly thereafter we began dating. He's an absolutely AMAZING man & I love him to pieces. He propoed this past St. Patricks Day and the wedding is happening this September (only 4 months to go- yikes!). So as you can imagine I've been super busy with planning a wedding and still juggling all of life's other responsibilities. But, needless to say, I'm one happy & very blessed girl!

Now onto weightloss talk!

Currently, I'm at 195lbs (ish- the scale was a little wacko today but I'm sure some of the things that was causing it to be that way will be gone for my "real" weigh in on Sunday). My goal for the wedding is to be 175lbs so a loss of 20lbs in 4 months (or 5lbs a month).

A year ago I would have looked at this goal and thought, "Really, Tiffany!?! Only 20lbs in 4 months?? You can do so much better than that!." But what I've learned is that the reality is that I'm not where I was a year ago, it has proven to be a bit more of a challenge for me to see steady weight loss these days so losing 5lbs a month consistantly is a doable but still very challenging goal at this stage in the game.

Another great thing that the wedding has brought on is that I feel like it brought back the old fighter in me that got me to where I am today; truthfully, I've felt that for the past 6 months or so that I've just been a tamed version of myself and that I just couldn't seem to flip that switch in my mind again that allows me really give this my all. But thankfully, that switch has finally been flipped thanks to the wedding and I'm working my bum off because truthfully, I'm just ready to be at my goal weight (for now) of 175lbs and I'm gonna do whatever it takes to get there.

Ta- Ta for Now!

The Recipe for Success Never Changes.

This has been one of those weeks where I am forced to remember that what got me to the place I'm at now (losing 153lbs) hasn't been luck; it has been sheer determination, hardwork & perserverance and I would be a fool to think that it will take anything less to finish out this journey.

For the past 2 weeks I've been really trying to kick it into high gear both nutritionally & in my fitness- so much so that I've been drinking one of these babies for breakfast & dinner every day:

Looks appetizing, eh? This yummy concauction was made with: Vanilla Bean Lean Shake Powder (GNC), strawberries, spinach (hence the green color), water & ice. Luckily it wasn't until the last couple days that I realized adding a tablespoon of peanut butter makes these smoothies about 500x's more delicious (but also adds calories & fat).

So combining eating about 1200-1300 calories a day with exercising 5x's per week at a relatively high intenstity, you would think would equal a loss. Well, it didn't. In fact, yesterday morning the scale read 200. A number I would have been fine to never see again. I know I will continue to lose and that 200lbs will be a distant dream soon enough but I just didn't feel like the effort I was putting in showed up with the results I saw.

So what to do? What to do when you're eating crap you really don't even like, saying no to chocolate and late night snacks, and you feel like your hardwork isn't being rewarded? You just. keep. pushing. Here's a picture of me doing just that:

As I've mentioned before, I'm training for a 5K using the C25K program and for whatever reason there are days that I feel like a gazelle and that I could have gone farther, longer & then there are days when I feel like I want to just lay down on the treadmill & cry. Yesterday was one of those days; in fact, before I even got to the gym it was one of those days! I was TIRED, not feeling so great but I did what I knew I should and know has brought me the success I've seen thus far, I drug my butt to the gym and completed Week 2, Day 2 (for about the 3rd time now haha) and tomorrow morning I'll do the same thing (after a spin class this evening).

I'm choosing to operate from this principle: I know that anything that is truly worth having, is worth working your butt off for and I will push, push, push until I get where I want to be. Yes, the future isn't as clear as I'd like it to be and I don't know what next week's weigh in will be or the week after that, but I do know what I have control over and that's ME.

Sidenote: I'm excited that I've finally got back to what seems to be a regular blogging schedule; once a week on Fridays. I really do love blogging and think it has value to me, my journey, and hopefully to you all as well. Just a random thought!

Also, I also feel like I have about 10 million topics that I'm dying to write/share about with you all and I hope that you'll find them helpful/interesting as well as I'll be tackling them here in the upcoming weeks- just to give you an idea and tickle your bloggy tastebuds, some of these topics include:

• The negative side effects of weight loss (yep, they exist).
• My new relationship & how that ties in with weight loss.
• Skin Removal Surgery
• And more!

I leave with you this little piece of inspiration I saw yesterday on Pinterest...

It's. Been. Done.

After 30 months of:

• Dragging myself to the gym when I felt like I didn't belong and would rather do just about anything else.
• Saying no to the things that had become dependencies & almost addictions (aka: caramel frappuccinos).
• Counting calories day in and day out.
• Eating what seemed to be the same thing day in and day out.
• Completely restructuring the way I think about myself and what it is to truly be good to myself.
• Fighting through feeling deprived or an "it's not fair attitude."
• Convincing myself that anything is actually possible and that I wasn't bound to a life of obesity.
• Saying no to french fries, pizza, and cookies being a part of my regular diet (I still have them every once in a while- as a TREAT not a regular staple!)
• Having to be the only person not participating in indulging in all sorts of desserts and fried foods at what seems to be weekly office parties.
• Waking up at 6:45am on Saturday mornings for spin class when all I really want to do is sleep in.

After, no BECAUSE, of all of this, after weighing in 30 months ago at 352lbs, yesterday I stepped on the scale and saw this...

And I swear I thought I was gonna break my scale from jumping up and down on it! No joke- I seriously I just could not stop jumping up and down in my living room shouting "Yes!" "Yes!" "Yes!" and pumping my fist/arms every which way; truthfully I was even a bit surprised at my reaction, I was certainly happy when I lost 100lbs, but this was something different..I simply could not contain the overwhelming feeling of victory & joy it gave me.


I know that for most people weighing 199lbs is no big accomplishment (in fact, it would be a nightmare to most), but for me- it was something I truly was never sure I'd see. I honestly couldn't tell you the last time there was a #1 in front of my weight...if I had to guess I would say maybe it was when I was...15 years old? Sometimes throughout this journey it felt like weighing in the 100's was just a pipe dream, as if it were possible for everyone else, but just not for me- I knew that maybe I'd get to the low 200's, but the 100's? It almost just didn't even seem like an option. And now, it's MY REALITY. And it's. been. done.

Since the very beginning of this journey I've really only had 3 weightloss goals and as of yesterday, I've accomplished 2 of the 3:

Goal #1: Lose 100lbs (Completed!)
Goal #2: Get out of the 200's (Completed!)
Goal #3: Weigh 180lbs (Not yet Completed...)

How I approach this 3rd goal will be a little different than how I've approached the last two. When I first began I knew that I couldn't rush this process- that I had a lot of weight to lose and that there wasn't going to be a quick fix to the mess I had gotten myself in and it was with that mindset that I approached and accomplished my first 2 goals; however, with this 3rd one I have a different strategy...

I don't want to drag the final part of this journey out. I have 19lbs to go and I know that I can lose it because I've already lost 153lbs but I know that I am easily tempted to not really give my all, my very best and that when I do that it consequently takes me much longer to lose weight than it really needs to. I'm still not looking for a "quick fix" but I'm also not looking to take this last 19lbs leisurely- I want to knock it out; specificially by May 19th which is the date of a wedding I am a bridesmaid in. Basically that means I have a little over 2 months to lose the 19lbs pounds and it equals out to about 2lbs a week (give or take a bit) which I think is still a completely realistic amount of weight to be losing at my current size. I really believe that finishing this journey will look like one of two things:

1) It taking me 6 months to lose the last 19lbs.
2) It taking me 2 months to lose the last 19lbs.

And the difference won't be because my body just won't drop the weight, the difference will be in whether I am giving it my very best or whether I'm just going at it laxadisically. And I am choosing to give it my very best and if for some reason that still doesn't equate to weighing 180lbs on May 19th then I'm okay with that, because I will have done everything I can do.

There are so many exciting things God has in store for me this year, some I know about and I'm sure there are even more that I don't and truthfully, I just want to be done with this. I know that I'll never be finished exercising or eating healthy, but I'm ready to be at the maintenance phase and I'm ready to enjoy living my life with my body at it's very best that it can be.

I am by no means saying that 180lbs is my ultimate weight, but I would guess that it would be somewhere around there; being that I have a larger frame and I am almost 5'10'', it's not that far off from what the "charts" say I should weigh (which is between 153-173lbs) and I'll re-evaluate when I get there but my goal isn't to be the absolute skinniest I can be, it's to be and look healthy & fit.

I know I've rambled a bit here at the end but needless to say I am SO excited, proud, and thankful to God for where I stand today...all 199lbs! And now, moving forward to prove to myself that I can do even more things I never thought possible...

Happy Friday :)

Checking In! Progress Pics & More :)

Well hellllo!

Wow- it has been a loooonnnnng time since I last posted. Although I miss blogging and reading blogs dearly, I've come to accept that it's just not something that fits regularly into my life right now but I don't want to shut this blog down completely so I plan to try and post at least monthly- I understand by doing this I'm not necessarily providing a sense of support to the blogging/weight loss community like I was in the past, so this blog will basically just exist as a way for me to keep record of what has happened & continues to happen and if anyone else benefits from reading, then great :)

Life over the past couple months has been pretty amazing- lots of changes for sure. Let's see...some of the more monumental occurences have been:

Visiting Israel: For two weeks in November a group of friends and I from church traveled all around the nation of Israel- what an absolutely incredible experience it was. Here's a pic of me in front of Jerusalem.

Visiting Home for XMas: All of my family lives on the west coast while I live in the east coast; I only get to go home to see them once a year (at xmas) and two xmas' ago when I went home I had lost 70lbs and that was quite the shock for them- this year when I went home I wanted to have lost another 70lbs (which I did!) for a total of 140lbs lost and they were easily twice as shocked as last year. Truthfully, this was a really healing & redemptive time for me. Many of the people in my life today never knew me at 352lbs- sure they see that I'm continuing to lose weight but they don't know who I was back then and truthfully how I've been literally my entire life up until the past 2 years. My family  has always been nothing but loving and supportive of me in every way- they never once said anything about my obesity (although perhaps they should have) but I always knew that silently, it worried them and they wanted better for me so it was just SO nice to be able to give that gift to my family members this season. I also felt like them seeing me healthy and happy was just one final way of really showing them that I'm an adult now & that I have my own life and that I'm doing okay. Although at first I could tell they weren't sure if I wanted them to make a fuss over it or not, eventually they learned that it didn't bother me and expressed how amazed and proud of me they were. It was definitely a healing trip. Below is a pic of me and 2 of my cousins on my last night there.

Falling In Love: Yep, it's true. It happened. For the past couple months I have been dating an absolutely amazing man of God. He is the kindest man I know and I am blessed to be able to love him and be loved by him :) And because this is a weight loss blog I will mention that we've known eachother for about 2 years now so he's seen me at all sorts of different weights- I'm sure I'll post more about this subject at a later date.

                                         

                                               

And now onto what I'm sure you're all most curious about (and kinda the point of this blog)...weightloss! Given that I haven't posted in almost 4 months I'm sure some of you were worried that I had fallen off the proverbial "wagon" and gained back half of what I'd lost- well, not hardly! Since my last post I'm down another 20lbs and at my lowest weight of...well since I can remember lol of 204lbs for a total current loss of 148lbs!!! I promise not to toot my own horn for the rest of this post but just give me a minute....TOOT TOOT!!! Alright, so that I can move on with my life, here are my next set of progress pics (going from my first pic taken at 333lbs, the pic I took right before this one at 224lbs, and then my current pic at 204lbs).



224 lbs.

204 lbs.

224 lbs

204lbs

224lbs

204lbs

So now that I feel like I've caught ya'll up on everything, I guess I'll share where I'm currently at with everything and where I want to go (in my favorite bulleted style of course!) Recently I've been getting a lot of emails from readers who are either just wanting to make sure I'm still alive or are looking for advice- and as unfortunate as it may be, I really don't have time to respond to each one although I'd love to, so I thought I'd just share in this post what I'm currently doing to continue losing weight and hope that it answers some questions. Thx for being understanding!

• Right now I really don't know what my final goal is but it's currently set at 180lbs so I have another 24lbs to go; however, I have a mini-goal before that of getting into the 100's by the end of February. I honestly cannot even fathom my weight having a number 1 in front of it...and the fact that I'm only 5lbs away from that is just insanely amazing. My goal is to be at 180lbs by the end of April- a lofty goal, I know, which is why I'm currently living at my best potential ever.
• Exercise: Right now I'm still exercising 5x's per week (but let's be honest, sometimes it's 4xs). I do a 60 minute spin class at least twice a week, 20 minute interval strength training circuit 3 times per week, and I run 3x's per week as I'm training for my first 5k later this year! What what! This is by no means the most hardcore exercise routine but it is the absolute most that I can do with working almost 2 full time jobs, having a boyfriend, and just living life; which means I've gotta be hardcore with my nutrition.
• Nutrition: I still am adhering to the principle that no food is completely off limits but I do live within a strict calorie budget of 1200-1300 calories per day. I still use the MyFitnessPal App to track my caloric intake (it's amazing). I still do all my food prep on Sundays for the week and while I don't eat completely clean or preservative free, I limit my calories and that's what works for me.
• This is a really unique season of this journey for me. I don't feel like I'm in 911 mode anymore where it's evident that my life is in danger because I could have a heart attack any second or get diabetes, like I said earlier- I really don't remember being this "small" so it's been hard for me not to become complacent with where I am. One of the huge things that is keeping me going and really not settling for less than my best is visualization. I frequently visualize both the things that I don't ever want to go back to (not being able to ride roller coasters or fit in certain seats) as well as the things that I still can't do but deserve to and want to (wear cute dresses, swimsuits, and sleeveless tops). I'm now at the point where every pound lost is uncharted territory and while it's a bit harder to believe that I can ever really be just normal, I am refusing to quit until I find out.

I hope you all have enjoyed the update- I've certainly enjoyed sharing. Who knows, maybe I'll be able to share more frequently than I think- I know I would definitely love to see how some of my favorite bloggy buddies are doing these days! My parting words are these: Stay strong- you DESERVE to be happy with who you are on every level- YOU are the only one who can and is gonna get this done and when it's all said and done you will be one thing you haven't been of yourself in a long time- PROUD.

Peace out ya'll!